archives (by month):
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
Mission control, please come in. We can't land now... there's some sort of giant cloud formation surrounding us. It smells... it smells like rubber. Please advise.

In low-income parts of the U.S., increasing numbers of babies are born addicted to Pringles. I tried to stop, explained this child's mother, breaking down in tears, but I had to pop.

Ah! Stop, dude, stop! I thought you meant we were gonna go make signs callin' the president a nnnn... Not very good... president.

I'm actually between labels at the moment... figuring out my options. You can download my music, though. Just search for Uncle Nintendo.

During its long and secretive development the Segway code-named Ginger went through several design changed. One of the original prototypes shown above included a robotic arm to allow the user to smoke while riding

Stand over there. A little further, there you go. Okay so you're me and I'm the dude right? He goes I'ma Im'a punch this fuckin alligator! and next thing you know I got an arm that tastes like Bud Light.

Yeah, put on the hat! the girl cheered. Now you understand the frequency too! We're all interlocked on, like, the psychic level. As he grimaced, waiting for the click of the phone-camera, J decided to call up Lou Barlow and get the band back together. Nothing, he thought, could be worse than this.

all right son visiting hours are over craig the night manager gestured toward the automatic doors with his baton pick up your sunglasses and move on out you don't want em to lose visiting hours altogether craig had seen a lot over the years and he wasn't entirely convinced that the display wasn't just a put-on for the lockup: raw fruit cameras hovering nearby

That's what you get for tryin' to break into my house, computers!

WORST CONGRESS EVER - Infuriated that Democrats now controlled both the Senate and the executive branch, dozens of Republicans took to the streets last Saturday. Several of the protesters were even seen standing up.

Burger King Breakfast: Global Warming Is Baloney (Al Gore)

Although a widely-circulated photo of President Obama (above) suggests that he was boner-ogling a junior G8 delegate, video of the incident revealed that it was a single frame taken out of context, and the president was not, in fact, sipping Dockers knob with his thirsty presidential gaze.

You want ride horse? Five dollar. I should've done this years ago. (Should have.)

Read Atlas Shrugged: It changed my life, man. I used to be a smug prick and now I'm a smug prick with a gigantic sign.

Mom! No! Get out! Ryan cried. But it was too late - she had already heard him listening to Ace of Base. The damage was done. His face reddened with shame, and as he bawled uncontrollably, his computer speakers softly sang, "It opened up my eyes; I saw the sign" in what now seemed to be a cold attempt to mock him at his weakest.

Great idea! That'll keep all those Iraqis from forgetting that we invaded them.

There was a timid knock at the door. "Hey! You like Pikachu?" It was my neighbor from 4A. Without opening the door, I called back, "Nah... I'm more of a Snorlax guy." There was a pause, and I heard her walk back through the hallway, close her front door, and although I couldn't be entirely sure, the faint cry of her sobbing.

Finally, I'd like to make it clear to the members of the press that, however funny you may find it, the vice president's privates are not a subject appropriate for national news.

archives (by month):
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec






